Happily Never After
by Wandering Dawn
Summary: Tonks never made it to the final battle. But Remus did...


Happily Never After

"Please, Dora. Stay here with Teddy. Please! I couldn't bear it if I lost you! Teddy needs at least one parent, and I'm much more expendable than you!"

"HOW CAN YOU EVEN SAY THAT?" Tonks yelled back, her hair turning the ugly shade of orange it always did when she was angry. "How can you say you're more expendable? I'm a freaking auror Remus! If anyone should be going it should be me!" at that moment little Teddy Lupin decided to make it known that his parents had awoken him and upset him. His hair was a dark blue with a hint of lilac for confusion as to why they were arguing so loudly. Tonks sighed going to her son's side. She stared as Remus once he was safely tucked up in her arms, finally calming down, his hair returning to its usual shade of turquoise. "Please, Remus. Don't leave me... don't leave Teddy. If I can't go then neither can you."

Remus sighed running a hand over his aged face. "Fine. I won't go. I'll stay with you and Teddy." He walked over and held her to him tightly kissing the top of her head. "I'm going to get some fire whiskey. It's going to be a long night. Do you want anything?"

"Butterbeer will be fine, oh and can you make up a bottle for Teddy?" Remus nodded leaving the room with a sorrowful look on his face to his wife and son, knowing what he had to do. He had to go. He knew he did. But they weren't going to follow him. He was going to make sure of it. Going into the kitchen he pulled out a phial of sleeping potion from the cupboard and tipped it into Tonks' butterbeer after making Teddy a warm bottle of milk, heating it through with his wand.

Taking it to her he kissed her softly before giving it to her and taking Teddy, settling on the bed to give him his milk. Just as expected, Tonks began to fall asleep within minutes of taking his first gulp of butterbeer. Smiling he put Teddy in his crib and laid down with his wife. "Sleep, Love," he said kissing her head softly. "You're going to be tired after today." She nodded curling up in his arms, resting her head on his chest. Smiling he kissed her head again whilst whispering, "I love you so much... I'm so sorry." He pulled away from her after a few moments, kissed Teddy's head, refusing to let his tears fall before leaving a letter on the bedside table and dissapperating to the Hogwarts grounds.

Teddy's hair changed back to the deep blue of his sadness, sensing that something was going to go wrong. His cries echoed through the house, unnoticed by his mother who was in a deep dream about her perfect happy ending.

Hours later Tonks stirred from her endless sleep with a contented smile gracing her well-rested face. Turning onto her side she felt around on the bed for Remus, her content smile turning into confusion when she couldn't feel him beside her. Her heart began to race as she noticed the darkness outside and Teddy crying softly in his crib, his hair the deep blue that meant sadness. She got up to pick him up, finally noticing the letter on the table on his side of the bed. Picking it up with shaking hands she began to feel her veins fill with dread, her blood running cold as she realised what he had done. Putting a dummy in Teddy's mouth and stroking his cheek softly he began to drift off to sleep again, his hair turn yellow with happiness. Tonks smiled softly at her son before turning back to the letter he had left her. Opening it with trembling hands she could feel the tears already pooling in her eyes.

_My dearest Dora, _

_If you are reading this it means you have awoken from you sleeping potion and I am gone. I'm sorry I had to leave you like that, I honestly did not have a choice. I couldn't let you come with me because I couldn't risk losing you. Teddy needed you. I needed you. If I survived and you didn't I don't know how I would have coped. But you're young, if I don't make it you can find someone else. You're not half as expendable as I am, Dora. But I promise you that no matter what. You are the love of my life. I will never ever forget you and Teddy. If I do not return, please, don't let Teddy forget about me. Tell him how much I love him and never, ever, forget how much I love you. Because I do, Dora. I did this for you, because I love you and I love Teddy. Please don't be mad. I just wanted to protect you. You mean so much to me. I love you, Dora. Don't ever forget. _

_Love your dearest husband, Remus. I love you so much. No regrets. _

By the time she was done with the letter tears were falling from her eyes, some angry, some sad. She stood up grabbing her wand, ready to apparate to Hogwarts to beat his worthless ass. Then she finally registered the soft voices floating up from the kitchen. Slowly walking downstairs, she recognised Kingsley's voice.

"He died fighting, she should be proud of what he did for the world. I know it won't make it easier but, Remus really did fight valiantly." Breathless. That's all she felt. Broken breathlessness. Her heart felt like it was being stabbed over and over, shattering into a million mangled pieces. He hadn't made it. Teddy had no father. She had no husband. How could he have done this to her? she walked in, making her presence known, a stony expression on her face, hiding the devastation that was settling in her heart. "Nymphadora... Remus..."

"Don't. Call. Me. Nymphadora." Kingsley hesitated, studying her carefully. "How could you let him fight? How could you let him die? HOW COULD HE DO THIS TO ME?" All resolve crumbled. Laying in a sobbing heap on the floor she couldn't help but yell curses, profanities, anything. Magic surged through her veins at the immense heartbreak, causing several mugs and glasses to shatter into tiny little crystals, the lights flickering on and off and knives flying towards the minister, stopping just short of the bridge of his nose before falling to the ground as she continued to sob.

Andromeda ran towards her daughter, gathering her into her arms and rocking her back and forth. "I think you should leave, Minister. She clearly isn't in any shape to talk. And if you don't leave, I'm afraid one of those knives will actually hit you." Kingsley nodded in understanding before making a swift exit. Andromeda turned her attention back to the sobbing mess of her daughter. "Shh sweetie. I know it hurts, I know. Please, try to calm down. Teddy is upstairs, remember. he doesn't like to see his mummy upset." Tonks just cried harder at the thought of Teddy. Her Teddy. His Teddy. Their Teddy, all alone, without a father figure in his life. She vowed from that moment on she would never let Teddy out of her sight. He was her last link to Remus and she'd be damned if she let him go.

**AN: review? please? it would mean the world! please don't favorite without reviewing**


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